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Wednesday
04Feb2009

Pasión

3ww prompt Feb. 4th - crumple, illicit, nerve sketchbook page by marisol diaz

down fell my unzipped, jilted and beaten armor
the air pressure exuding from your mouth is about to crumple the metal into shivered, penalized tin
illicit because we shouldn't always get what we want - too many ruins are erected
left in the amber light is naked flesh, palpitating heart and one single raw nerve.

3ww1.jpg

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Reader Comments (9)

very visual words, descriptive of pain and relief, inhale, exhale...great work, my love

February 4, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterstainboy

Very well penned. I like the descriptiveness all the way through.

February 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterThomG

"illicit because we shouldn't always get what we want"

especially like this line.

February 4, 2009 | Unregistered Commentersusan

hi Amaretto girl! TOO long since i visited u!hope u are well
your verse was intense! love it

February 4, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterlucy

Powerful piece of passion and pain. Nice!!

February 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTumblewords

Gushing words, gaping truth! Powerful.

Mine's a pure senseless passion - Scary Story

February 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMeera

I could feel the rawness in this piece...passionate yet heartbreaking.

February 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterFledgling Poet

kind of wistful, passionate, I like the ending

February 5, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterlissa

Whoa! Powerful!

February 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterZouxzoux

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